By C. Ravindra
I got married when I was 22 years old. My husband was 33. In the beginning, everything was perfect between us. No matter how much we argued during the day, by night, we would forget everything and feel close again.
At first, I didn’t want to
marry him because of the age difference, but my family insisted, and I agreed.
With time, things began to
change. I was young and full of energy. I enjoyed talking and laughing with my
friends, but my mother-in-law didn’t like this. She said, “You are newly
married, and you should respect your father-in-law and brother-in-law.”
I didn’t change my habits,
which made her dislike me even more, but I didn’t care.
The Turning Point
A year after our marriage, my
husband had to go abroad for work. I told him I wanted to go with him, but he
refused, saying it was only for two months and that his parents and unwell
brother needed me at home.
We argued. I told him, “I
married you, not your family.” He finally said, “Fine, get your passport made.”
When my passport was ready, he
got upset and said, “You only do what you want.” I replied, “Yes, I don’t need
anyone’s opinion to make my decisions.”
This escalated, and my
mother-in-law begged me to stay, saying it was just two months. I agreed to
stay, but only if I could live at my parents’ house during that time.
When my husband returned, he
didn’t come to pick me up. Over the phone, he said, “Marriage is about
cooperation, but you only think about yourself. This relationship can’t work
anymore.”
The End of the Marriage
He sent divorce papers. My
family tried to convince me to patch things up, but I valued my self-respect.
At 23, I was divorced.
Life After Divorce
By the time I turned 25, I
decided to remarry. But I only met men who were much older, widowed, or
divorced. I felt judged because of the stigma surrounding second marriages.
Now, I’m 30 and still
unmarried. When I reflect, I sometimes think that insisting on going abroad
with my husband might have been a mistake. If I hadn’t argued, maybe things
would have been different.
A Message for Women
Divorce is not as simple as it
seems. Movies and TV shows make it look easy, but the reality is harsh. Life
becomes much harder afterward.
No matter how strong or capable
we women are, there’s always a fear of being alone. Having a partner often
eases that fear, even if we don’t admit it because of our ego.
To all young girls, I say this:
Don’t take decisions like divorce lightly. Small issues can be resolved with
patience. Once you break a marriage, life becomes even more difficult.
If my story hurt anyone, I’m
sorry. My only intention is to share my experience and help others.
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