There are some basic psychological and emotional differences in the makeup of a man from that of a woman that goes a long way to inform some of the distinct behavioural patterns exhibited by men. Over time, research has shown that men and women think differently.
Men primarily think on the left side of the
brain, while women are typically right-brain thinkers. This puts men on the
more aggressive side of life and they often hunt and conquer. As a result,
there is a strong ego embedded inside an average man.
It is important for a wife to have this basic
knowledge of the fact that an average man has an ego. This understanding makes
the woman cope more readily whenever she sees ego on display from her
husband. But the issue of pride is a little more on the extreme and it can be a
marriage killer. Family Encounters came in contact with quite a number of women
who complained that their husbands are proud.
They asserted that their men would never
admit it whenever they went wrong. They are always Mr. Right and all their
decisions are perfect. You do not need to have a miserable marriage if your
husband’s weakness is pride. There are several ways to live with a proud husband.
1. The first step to take is to accept him
the way he is. Before your marriage to him, there might have been some signals
promoting you to the act that he is a proud man, but you loved him enough to
marry him.
It is just like a man that snored terribly
whenever he sleeps. This snoring of his may be a source of serious irritation
to you, but you know that the man cannot help it. What do you do regarding this? You
learn to accept the snoring and with time it may not mean anything to you
anymore. Learn to accept that your husband is a proud man and loves him the way he
is.
2. Learn to be amused by some of his
mannerisms of pride without being offended. I know of a man who has a wife and
five children. Whenever any of his children behave well or did well at school,
he would always give the credit to himself by saying that it is because that
child took after him. Meanwhile, if any of them failed in any way, he’d
say that they took that from his wife and from his wife’s family. Initially, the women didn’t find
it funny. But then, she found out that it was a sign of pride on his part and
decided to get amused by it whenever the man came up with such assertions. She
took the matter lightly and it doesn’t offend her anymore.
3. Try to identify the things that anger him
very easily and avoid them. A man has ten toes. But there can be particular
toes that you step on and it seems as if you have stepped on his very manhood.
Be careful not to step on a man that toe because anytime you step on it, the
man must react.
4. A proud man feels threatened when his wife
is rising higher than him. It is up to the woman to continually give him his
due respect as her husband and always reassure him of the fact that he is her
leader any day and that whatever she achieves is for both of them.
5. Be conscious of the fact that your man is
the head of the home and that you play a supportive role in his life. Most men
do not want their wives to tell them what to do, especially if he is a proud man
because they’d feel that they are being controlled. If that is the case with
your husband, then let your contribution to his decisions be in the form of
suggestions. Always use the word “what if”. For example, you may give a
suggestion in this manner – “honey, what if you use that money to buy a piece
of land instead of another car.?”
6. A proud husband hates any form of public
confrontation from a wife no matter how mild. Always be at peace with your
proud husband, therefore, humility is going to be the dress that you can quietly
influence him for good. You can influence him into the right company of
friends.
7. When the actions of pride of a proud husband always go unchallenged, it tends to increase because there is nobody to correct him. Sometimes you have to challenge him and speak out your feelings because he may not know the extent of the wounds he is inflicting on you emotionally. But the woman should do this with a lot of discretion and in the right atmosphere so as to achieve the desired results.
Also, the interval should
be well placed so that it doesn’t seem as if she is nagging him. But you
have to express your feelings in a mature, firm, and unequivocal manner and
then start loving him again. You shouldn’t die in silence. You don’t need to
swallow a live toad. The pride of some men is like a live toad.
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